The Secret to Stress Relief for High Achievers- Mini Episode

Are you struggling under the weight of impossibly high standards and the constant pressure to over-deliver? 

Discover the subtle art of easing up on perfectionism with Dr. Jillian Bybee, a pediatric critical care medicine physician, medical educator, and coach, as she shares life-changing insights from her own experience with burnout recovery. 

Tune in to learn how giving just 1% less effort in non-priority areas can help you break free from the cycle of overworking and reclaim much-needed time for rest and recovery.

This short episode delivers 3 actionable strategies for getting started in your own life today. 

Join me for more over on social media:

• Blog: Humans Leading | Jillian Bybee
• Instagram: Jillian Bybee, MD (@lifeandpicu)
• LinkedIn: Jillian Bybee, MD | LinkedIn 
• Threads: @LifeandPICU
• Website: Contact — Jillian Bybee, MD (jillianbybeemd.com)

If you’re ready to kickstart your journey (or your team's journey) to a less stressed life, I’m ready to help you! You can get in touch about 1:1 coaching or inviting me to facilitate a workshop for your group, get in touch via my website. 

Transcript

Dr. Jillian Bybee 0:04

Hello and welcome to Humans Leading , a podcast aimed at restoring the well-being and joy of high achievers who have burned out on their way to success . I'm Dr Jillian Bybee , a pediatric critical care medicine physician , medical educator , coach and leader in well-being and professional development . I use my personal experience with burnout recovery to help others do the same . This podcast is for anyone looking to move beyond hustle culture in order to find true fulfillment and well-being . In each episode , I share practical solutions on a variety of topics , including limiting beliefs , stress management , leadership , well-being and more . If you're looking to feel less stuck and redefine what a successful life looks like for you , this is your podcast . Come join me . Hello and welcome back to Humans Leading , a podcast where you can discover how to live a less stressed , more satisfying life . In today's episode , I'm talking about perfectionism , how it leads to stress in our lives and the secret to beginning to tackle it . Recently , I led a stress management workshop for a group of amazing professional women in my organization and I got a lot of nods when I started to talk about how stressful it can be to be a high-achieving perfectionist . As high achievers , we can often feel driven to meet impossibly high standards . We equate hard work with success and feel a constant need to over-deliver in every aspect of our professional and home lives . But there's a problem with this approach when you're trying to give 150% to everything and everyone , you end up with nothing to give yourself . You end up burning out because you're trying so hard . Does this sound familiar to you ? If so , you're in good company . High achievers often believe that putting in more effort automatically leads to better results . We can focus on unnecessary details or overextend ourselves on tasks that don't really move the needle in our careers . When we fall short of our standards , we double down on the effort that we're making , thinking that if we can just be more disciplined or more efficient , we can get it all done perfectly . This tendency to overwork was part of what drove me into burnout in the early part of my career . I was overcommitted and unable to keep all of the balls in the air , and eventually they all came crashing down . What we need to do is learn to prioritize what is actually the most important in our lives and give our best effort in those areas . The secret to combating the stress caused by perfectionism in our lives is to learn how to try a little bit less hard in the areas of our lives that aren't a priority .

Dr. Jillian Bybee 2:36

For a coaching client of mine , we had to start really small in order for her to get started . She felt that lowering the bar on her standards would mean she was a bad doctor . Get started . She felt that lowering the bar on her standards would mean she was a bad doctor . So it was important for us to go slowly . As she worked on changing her habits and her mindset , she decided to practice giving 1% less effort in some areas of her work , because she understood that not everything deserves the same amount of effort , and she used the 5-10 minutes that she saved every day to begin to do things for herself that helped her recharge during her day . This allowed her to feel less stress and to get out of the cycle of overworking and perfectionism . But it didn't all happen overnight . She knew this would be hard for her and said it was extremely helpful to have me as an accountability partner and cheerleader . The thing was , even before we made this plan together , my client already knew that this was the way to less stress and more time for herself . She knew that she had to try less in some areas , but she hadn't been able to give herself the permission . Instead , she had been taking a lot of efficiency courses and trying to work harder , which was only burning her out . In order to give herself permission , she needed me as her coach , to help , and she's in really good company .

Dr. Jillian Bybee 3:44

According to an American Society of Training and Development study , people are 95% more likely to succeed by directing their accountability to a third party and having regular check-ins with that person . This has certainly been true in my own life . I've been fortunate to have a few coaches who have been able to be accountability partners for me , and I've been able to make progress because of it . People are also more likely to succeed if they start small , and that's what I'm encouraging you to do today . That's really why 1% was a great place to start for this client . Like everything , it's a work in progress for her , and it's still a work in progress for me in my own life . The good news is I can work on it , and so can you .

Dr. Jillian Bybee 4:23

Before I dive into the three practical strategies to try less hard in your own life , I want to remind you that this will be a process . You won't be able to be perfect at it . You will have to see what works for you make adjustments and try again . You'll also have to have an open mind about the process and about yourself . I know that can be really hard as a high achiever , especially if you have perfectionist tendencies , but it's helpful if you find some low stakes ways to do this . That's why we're setting a goal of trying 1% less , or maybe more if you're going to be an overachiever about it , but I encourage you to try this out in your own life today . If you want to live a different life , you have to do something different , and the good news is you can start today . So here are the three practical strategies to get started .

Dr. Jillian Bybee 5:08

Number one set clear priorities in your own life . Focus on key tasks and give your best effort in these areas . Give less of an effort on things that don't matter as much . This is where the 1% less comes in . Over time , you might find that you can eliminate some of the things you're currently doing . Number two practice micro-mindfulness . Integrate small moments of mindfulness to center yourself and shift away from obsessive work habits .

Dr. Jillian Bybee 5:35

Mindfulness does not mean meditation . Mindfulness means paying attention to the present moment , on purpose , non-judgmentally . This means that when you find yourself getting into a cycle of overwork , overwhelm and stress . You can ask yourself if there's a way you can try less and still have an acceptable result Over time and practice . This will allow you not to get stuck in these cycles of trying harder and harder .

Dr. Jillian Bybee 6:01

Number three start small . Like the client I talked about , you're more likely to succeed if you start incredibly small and build over time as you get more confidence instead of setting an unachievable goal for yourself . I know that can be hard as an overachiever , but it's really important if you want to have a less stressed life . So those strategies again are one set clear priorities . Two practice micro mindfulness to get out of overwhelm . And three start small and that's it . You're on your way to having less stress in your day and a little more breathing room for you to take care of yourself .

Dr. Jillian Bybee 6:35

Today's key takeaway is that trying less hard can lead to less stress and better results , even for high achievers . I encourage you to reflect on where you might be overextending and to try releasing some pressure in that area of your life . And thanks for listening . If today's episode resonated with you and you're ready to start letting go of perfectionism and the stress that comes with it , I invite you to visit my website , jillianbibemdcom , and learn more about working with me via coaching . Coaching is a powerful way to help perfectionists break free from the constant pressure to overperform , gain clarity on what really matters to them and embrace a more balanced and fulfilling life . This has certainly been true for me . Together with my clients , I work on practical strategies to help shift your mindset , manage stress and create sustainable success on your terms . You can head to JillianBibeMDcom and inquire about how we might start your journey today . See you next time , thank you .